9 Moons Ago

What an intense day. I have just enough energy to give a general update tonight, and will go into a little more detail next time.

Kathy and I hied off to Hershey this morning to sit and listen to an intense cram session all about the benefits and concerns about being tested for a genetic mutation which signals an increased risk for passing cancer along in the family. I’m primarily being tested to help me make the best decision about what kind of surgery I will need next. At any rate, it will most likely be a mastectomy on the left side, but if I do have this gene anomaly, I may consider a bi-lateral mastectomy. I want to do the least drastic thing, but also do enough to protect my health. One good thing is that if I get even just the single mastectomy, it will eliminate the need for radiation. Chemo is on the cards, though. I will have reconstructive surgery at some point, too. I heard from a few people who have had or know people who have had that done and it’s all positive and encouraging,

There was so much more discussed, but it was clear to both Kathy and I, and afterwards I did some paperwork, a family health history chart and had blood drawn. They will call be in to review the results in 2 to 4 weeks.

I normally don’t like to talk so much about physical illness, but this is a big thing and I am aware that you who bother to stop in truly want to know what’s been going on.
Mentally, emotionally.. just fine! Pretty effing fantastic, actually.

After the session, which was shorter than initially planned, due to the luck of someone canceling their appointment, we headed to Chocolate world, in the absolute crazy madness that is the rest-of-the-country and other-parts-of-the-world on Summer vacation. Living right near the place our whole lives, and going there often, especially off-season, we forget that Hershey is bigger than South Central Pennsylvania. But we waded through the sweaty sea of delighted and tired families, and found what we needed. We bought gifts for Mumsy, Dad and Kathy’s family. Kathy got her reeces pieces and I got some dark chocolate.

We went out to eat and shared a crab dip soft pretzel and I had a cup of french onion soup. Mmm.

Kathy and I napped/rested as soon as we were home, and later had a nice dinner with Mom while watching a couple of particularly hilarious episodes of the Office, one of which we hadn’t seen before.
I’m about ready to tumble into bed now. Thanks, all you lovely lot, for your notes, emails and comments. If you are reading this and I know you, in person, or through correspondence…I am most definitely thinking of you, too!
All My Love,
Amy

You Might Consider Reading This Book:
“The Road From Coorain” by Jill Ker Conway

Even though I started reading it in the mid 90s, and started more than once, because it is quite dry in places (similar to my experience w/ reading Out of Africa ), and before living in Australia was even a concept in my mind, I’ve finally finished Jill Ker Conway’s “clear-sighted memoir of growing up Australian”, “The Road From Coorain”, and oh the reward of exhilaration & emotion of finishing it! It taught me about a part of Australia that I knew nothing about and pleasantly reminded me of all that I did. I came back to finish this book knowing so much of the vernacular that, astutely, was not always explained, and the usual Aussie expressions and how they would sound rolling off the tongue, whether “properly”, bordering on an English accent, or broad and common, or with the dialect of an experienced self-described “blackfellah” from the bush. I could see the land and the people. I knew the heartache and narrowing tunnel of a long drought. The same class system and expectations of what it means to be Australian are still visible, decades later. It is beautifully crafted, even though there are a few places that I had to push through. There is warmth, wit, and tragedy. And oh, I cried!
But, I have to tell you, I consider this book to be one of the most rewarding I’ve ever read, not only for it’s content and beautifully crafted passages, rich with imagery, but also because of the last sentence. Perhaps it is because I have been there, because I am emotionally invested, and that I feel a connection with the spirit in which it is written, but I believe it contains the best last sentence of a book that I’ve ever read. I’ve never felt that way before, even with any of my favorite books. Finishing this memoir was a long-anticipated achievement and an emotionally rewarding trip. This isn’t necessarily among my top 5 reads, but if not, it’s hovering near there. And no matter what you’ve experienced of Australia, if anything, it will take you on a journey of the human dramas, loves, losses, excitements, unexpected twists, hopes and triumphs we all experience in a lifetime.

WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

Switching gears…

As for my health, still feeling sore and tender from the surgery. The antibiotics are slowly clearing up the infection and I’m making plans to get tested, in Hershey, to see if I carry a “cancer gene”. This will help me make a decision on how drastic my next surgery will be, perhaps help my siblings, should they want to know if there is a possibility that they carry it, and just help with research in general, so that somewhere down the line, it might help save more lives. I will be seeing an oncologist, in Hanover, for a first appointment on August 5. The plan is, that while I undergo chemo and radiation treatments, I will live most of the time with my Sister and her family, so that she can drive me to and from appointments, and so that, during the day, I will be with someone. She lives in Hanover, which is a 40 minute drive from Dallastown. I can’t thank her enough for all that she has already done for me, over and above what I would ask of anyone. Kathy has provided countless rides, anticipated my needs before I knew them myself, has done research on my behalf and has not treated me any differently, which is a relief. We still give each other a hard time, and still act silly, or bitch about what’s bothering us and I doubt she knows just how much it means to me to have her in my life. And, right behind her are tons of family and friends, and I really, truly, could not have made it this far without your love.
xo Amy

Yesterday was a mix of good family stuff & not-so-good medical. Blahhh. Stuff. At least 1 more surgery needed, decisions need to be made. They found precancerous cells during the operation to remove the cancer.. Add infection (OUCH) and a jammed finger (which has been hurting like crazy) to the mix. Will update everyone after Monday when I see the Dr. again. Good things: air conditioning, British comedies, Watermelon Italian Ice, Grape Soda and.. Watermelon. Which I’m off to fetch presently. As my Sister put it, so perfectly, “Cancer can kiss my ass!”

Hello all. Relay for Life was a blast on the weekend! Pictures and videos can be found here: Relay for Life 2010

I’ve had lab tests, bloodwork, an mri and a bunch of other stuff that all points to my being ready for surgery (a partial mastectomy/lumpectomy) on July the 15th. People have asked me if I’m nervous, but the truth is, not really. I feel positive, hopeful and just take each day as it comes. This is all possible because I have health care and the most overwhelming support from family, friends and the medical professionals that I’ve seen. This will be an outpatient procedure. I will be going home the same day. Incredible what advances in medicine there have been in just five years, let alone since my Grandmother was diagnosed in the late 1950s. She left this world too soon, but her daughter, my Aunt Mary, is a survivor as well, and there are so many others I know who have fought back and won their battles with cancer.

They tell me I’ll have chemo once I’ve recovered from the surgery, and after that, radiation. There is more to talk about concerning those subjects, but I won’t get ahead of myself. Just going to focus on the next step. I will update you when I come to those bridges.

Speaking of Bridges, I watched an old episode of The Closer with Mom tonight, and I think Beau Bridges is stunning in a frock!

I am very much loving the sound of steady rain for a greater part of today. It’s been so dry outside, and so long without it, that I am not listening to music for a change. The rain is a pleasant song tonight.

And I’m still being a goofball, no need to fear any change from that!:

Double Vision.

Fun With Broken Sunglasses.

Self Portrait With Olympus